The many faces of...

Six months...but who's counting?

Well, I turned six months old a couple weeks ago, and all of a sudden, *everything* changed. First, dad and mom went crazy with our friend Marta, and they dressed me up and took a lot of photos. In case you didn't know, Marta is our photographer friend, and she's really talented at capturing my chubby cheeks in print. Here's the compilation she made for me.





















Then, before I knew it, I was whisked away to see my very cute girlfriend, Maya. I don't think she was thrilled to see me at first, as you can see here. But later we went for a walk together (we loaded up our moms in the backs of our strollers) and all was good.

Today we went to my doctor's office and she said I did a great job growing my two bottom teeth. She saw some coming in on the top, too, and she gave dad and mom some instructions on how to feed me solid foods...finally. Little did she know that I *already* know how to eat winter squash (dad fed me some last night) and I could probably devour an entire jar of it if someone would just hand it to me. I've gotten over my ear infection, and my sleeping has been really good the past four nights. I am also allowed now to use a sippy cup (haven't seen what this is yet, but I have a feeling mom's gonna go out SHOPPING for one soon), and also I can chew on some teething cookies instead of cardboard.

I now weigh 19 pounds and 6 ounces (90th percentile), and am 28 inches long (90th percentile). My head circumference in particular gave my mom hope, as it is 18.25 inches (95th percentile), instead of the 15th percentile it was two months ago. After she measured my head, the nurse said I was smart -- well I told her, "and you haven't even seen my blog yet."

Later, folks.

Welcome to my crib

Over the weekend, mom and dad *finally* set up my new crib and cleared out the other room for me and all my miniature junk. I outgrew my cradle, which was set up next to my parents' bed, oh about a month ago and I suppose they finally understood that all my squirming and wimpering was in protest to the cradle closing in on me. Mom suddenly got the message and hauled the unassembled crib out of the living room where it was doing a lot of good propping up the wall, and assembled the whole thing herself in two hours. I must admit, she did a darn good job cause she had one side of the crib propped up with her forehead while holding the other side at a right angle with her toes, and bolted them together to a horizontal bar with a screwdriver in one hand and a hex wrench in the other. I think that's why dad finds her so sexy.


My new room used to be mom's office, and yesterday she and dad hauled away the bookshelves and computer equipment to make room for me. I slept in my new room for the first time last night, and I didn't have *any* separation anxiety, though mom seems to have some separation anxiety with her work space. Dad set up her desk and bookshelves in the dining room, which is more efficient use of that space, but now mom only has five feet to go to get to the fridge whenever she wants to procrastinate. She can push back from her desk in her rolling chair, lean back, and pull out a casserole and beer if she wanted to.

I also got a crazy cool new jumper for Christmas. I'm still working on launching a back flip off this thing, but in the meantime I'm having a great time just licking the toys.

Ten things no one told my mother about pregnancy, childbirth, and parenthood

1. Pregnancy doesn't last nine months -- it's actually 40 weeks, closer to ten months.
2. Pregnancy plays a cruel joke on you by making your hair grow thick and glorious, only to have it all fall out after childbirth.
3. Abstinence from alcohol doesn't last just during pregnancy, but throughout breastfeeding too -- a time in your life when you most want to be drinking.
4. Breastfeeding sucks.
5. You do not forget the birthing pains, your baby just gets cuter.
6. Crib mobiles are really only useful for three or four months, after which your baby can reach for, grab, and pull the entire thing down to come crashing on his head.
7. If you buy musical toys from the same manufacturer -- such as a mobile, a baby swing and a musical lantern from, say, Fisher Price -- they will all play exactly the same songs and this will slowly drive you insane.
8. If you forget to change the batteries in musical toys, the perky music quickly changes from soothing and peppy to eerie and weird -- kind of like how clowns and carnivals are fun and innocent when you're young, but can really creep you out when you're older.
9. Crotch extenders for onesies are a brilliant invention.
10. The most useful household item during and after pregnancy is that handheld shower nozzle -- great during pregnancy when you can't reach your feet, and perfect for hosing down the kid after his huge explosive poop.

A few words from my proud sponsor

Today I asked my mama to write a few thoughts about motherhood. Here she goes:

Hello to all of Devin's friends and family. Here's what life is like as a new mom for me. If you choose to switch places with me and live life in my shoes, be prepared for a wild time hauling around a ton of baby gear wherever you go, enduring earth-shattering screams, back-breaking manual labor lifting the baby, and being covered in spit-up. I hope you are ready. I also want to prepare you for the shock of finding out that you now are missing a good portion of your brain, as well as your ability to form full and comprehensible sentences. You will also lose much of your hair (yes, I am going bald and it sucks). I also hope you are looking forward to minor bouts of postpartum depression here and there, feeling like your marriage is about to crumble to pieces, and addiction to bad television programming.

Gone will be your days of being spontaneous, footloose and fancy-free...replaced by sleepless nights worrying about how the hell you will afford a new set of (larger sized) clothes for your new body, let alone tuition for your baby's college. You will never spend money on yourself or your appearance ever again -- and it will show. You will be moody and you will take Tylenol by the spoonful. Come dressed in a lot of black with dark rings under your eyes and stringy hair, and be prepared to snarl at people while you robotically slam down a stiff drink at 6 AM for breakfast. And of course, you will mix these drinks that get you through the day with the use of only one hand. (You will never again accomplish anything in life that requires the use of two.) Yes, this is what motherhood feels like.

If you choose to switch places with me, however, I wouldn't let you because Devin is the most exciting part of each day that I live and I wouldn't trade him for even a few steps in someone else's loafers, no matter how exotic, cushy, or fashionable the shoe. Mine fit fine as they are, and I am so lucky to be his mother.

November 7, 2005

Will you marry me?

Today we visited my girlfriend, Maya. She's a cutie, don't you think? She's a little over two weeks old in this picture, and was born November 4. We've got a lot in common, she and I: we were both born around the six pound range (Maya at 6 pounds and 5 ounces, me at 6 pounds and 15 ounces), and around 20 inches long (Maya: 19.5 inches, Me: 20 inches).


And her family ain't too bad either. I gotta behave around her big brother, though.


I'll wait about twenty years for your answer, Maya. So take your time and think about it. Maybe this picture of me will help you decide.

Whaddya think?

I get by

...with a little help from my friends.

A wedding? And another one?

In the past two weeks, I attended two weddings. The first one was for my dad's cousin, Kevin who married Se Ryun. The second wedding was for mom's friend Steffen, who married Elana. Kevin and Se Ryun had a Korean wedding, and Steffen and Elana had a Jewish wedding. I'll let you figure out which pictures are of which weddings.

One word sums it up

I've got...personality

So finally, their powers of observation have kicked in now that they've adjusted to sleep deprivation, and Mom and Dad have figured out a few things about my personality:

1. I like to smile, laugh, and talk; but I get the hiccups when I get too excited.
2. I make friends easily with stuffed animals.
3. I'm precious in the morning and cranky in the afternoon.
4. I'm ticklish under my arms when I'm being undressed for my bath.
5. I love baths.
6. I am generally a happy baby, except I will shatter glass with my scream if I'm hungry.
7. I'm a 2-faced devil: I'm adorable, cute, and well-behaved in public, but I look forward to coming home and raising hell.
8. I like physical actvities like being tossed into the air, riding on Daddy Race Car, having my swing turned up to level TEN, and being rocketed around the apartment with a jet-pack on my back.
9. I hate being swaddled and insist on having my arms free when I sleep.
10. I like to stick my feet into my own poop when I'm having my diaper changed.

Oops, I did it again

For the third time now since I was born, I slept through the night last night. The first time I did it was on the night of November 1, 2005. Mom and Dad have declared that date a national holiday, Hallelujiah! Last night I went to bed around midnight after we all watched Commander in Chief (I'm picking up tips on how I will run my 2040 Administration). Afterwards, I got my bath and a bottle of Magic Milk (that's breastmilk that has been blessed by sleepy monks somewhere in Tibet). Many many monks must've prayed over that breastmilk because I didn't even wake up for a diaper change.

This weekend I turned 100 days old, which is a big Korean deal. To celebrate, we spent the night with Grandma and Grandpa on Dad's side in Phelan, which is about two hours away from LA. We had a great time, and I got lobster- and steak-flavored breastmilk that evening. I think I tasted a hint of a Margarita, too (or two).

I would also like to take this opportunity to recap the past few months and offer reflection on my life outside the womb. Faithful readers and blog enthusiasts, where do I begin to continue my story? Oh yes: monkey business. Let me begin by telling you that I have lost all the hair on my back and shoulders that I was born with. Mom was pretty disgusted around Month Two when she found pieces of my back hair that had rubbed off and was stuck to my cradle mattress. But it's a relief knowing that I won't be going through life swinging from trees and dragging my knuckles on the ground. Here's an idea of what I'm talking about, for those of you who never got the 0pportunity to behold my glorious fur.


The photo above was taken on August 8, when I was five days old. And no, that's not a dark shadow cast across my shoulders; that's hair. The photo below was taken last night, after I completed a promotional trial of laser hair removal therapy (c'mon, we live in LA).


So as you can see, I've changed quite a bit. Most obvious to even the untrained eye, however, is my weight gain. To offer some perspective, here are BEFORE and AFTER photos of me in the same shirt. The fact that I've been wearing the same shirt for three months also gives you an idea of how inept Mom and Dad have been at buying me clothes that fit.

This photo was taken when I was two weeks old:

And this one was taken a few days ago:

Some other updates of interest: I have started talking in full sentences and often in iambic pentameter, although no one seems to understand me except Lucy. We seem to share a common repertoire of demands: Feed me, cuddle me, clean up my poop! Lucy's list also includes, "scratch my butt," but I haven't asked for that yet.

I've also started smiling and laughing, but only when Mom and Dad are making fools of themselves dancing around me like beasts. Most importantly, I voted in the special elections last week. Every vote counts, and I helped make history by defeating all of our numbskull governor's ballot initiatives. Take THAT, Arnie. Afterwards, I let Lucy wear my "I voted" sticker.

On my eating progress, I upgraded a month ago from 4-ounce bottles to 8-ouncers. These new bottles are as tall as my legs, and Mom likes to wrap a brown paper bag around it when she feeds me in public. But that doesn't keep me from consuming any and all of what Mom and Dad put in them, whether it's formula or breastmilk. Heck, I'm not picky. I'm eating anywhere from 4 to 6 ounces each feeding, about 6 to 8 times a day, averaging about 34 ounces daily. I don't know why Mom and Dad don't just call it even and let me knock back the days with a cool tall forty.

They do let me watch the Lakers games on TV, though, and I even get the whole couch. Dad's been training me to be a potato (see left).

I'm starting to suck on things a lot, like my entire fist or Dad's knuckles (tastes like chicken), and whatever toys I can manage to hold onto and guide into my mouth. Mom and Dad bought me 14 new bibs over the weekend. There was some issue about how much drool-drenched laundry I generate, but I am so totally worth it!

Yo mama, put down that burger and feed me!

To all my fans...

A big shout out to all my fans, and thanks for all your letters, emails, and phone calls. Many of you have requested that I update my blog, and I will do so soon, once I'm finished with my current growth spurt. Then I should have a little more time when I'm not eating, to provide an update on my most recent happenings. In the meantime, here's my glamour shot, taken by my friend Marta who is a fashion photographer here in LA. She usually shoots models and movie stars, so of course I was her next subject.

This was taken when I was one month old. I've plumped out a little bit (11 pounds, 10 ounces).


Devin
Next Male Supermodel

More pictures with Mom's family

These are some pretty neat pictures of us...oh yeah, and Lucy our two-legged dog!

Uncle Eric

Wow, I got to meet my Uncle Eric (my Mom's brother) for the first time today! He's a real card...and boy, does he like to drink beer!

More pictures with Grandma and Grandpa (of Mommy)

I got a kick out of this one. Here are a few more pictures.

Is that really my uncle?

Could someone who doesn't believe in the Lakers spirit, let alone in one particular player with my namesake, call himself my uncle?

Uncle Josh and Auntie Jo Lin came over to visit today (see pictures). When Uncle Josh read my blog, he and I didn't see eye-to-eye on something that cut to our understanding of some fundamental principles: he doesn't share in my belief that Devean George still has some potential on the team. OK, maybe he hasn't had displayed the brilliance everyone else expected from him...but he still has the chance to be the next stellar Laker role player.

I'm going to disregard the fact that Uncle Josh has cut me down before I've developed my mastery of my verbal skills. But I ask you one question: If you had a choice, would you rather have the name "Slava"? Huh, I didn't think so.

"And in THIS corner..."

Bummer that Mom and Dad couldn't celebrate their 2nd wedding anniversary yesterday, they were stuck at home with me, and called in a lactation consultant to get to work on me and to deal with my "issues". My only real problem is that I can't get a decent steak around here.

Mom and Dad took me to the Pump Station today to pick up a couple things. Mom got herself a couple of those cool gel discs that's supposed to help give her some relief from my relentless chewing. But we also slipped in a chance to use their scale for free.

And so after two weeks, I weighed in at 7 pounds and 11 ounces! Woo-hoo, were Mom and Dad stoked! They say I'm supposed to be losing my ounce-age during the first couple weeks, but dang...I'm puttin' it on! Dad thought about putting me on a low-carb diet, but then realized that I don't really have much of a choice to eat what I want.

A few more of mommy's visitors came by today.

Any suggestions for dry, flaky skin?

So to top off my hairy back and arms, ever since I made my grand entrance into this world, my skin's been peeling. Great, now I'm a tarantula. The ped said that I may have been overdue, because dry skin like mine is a sign that I've been inside a little too long. The flaky skin should go away in a couple weeks...even so, this sucks.

Check out today's pictures. Here's what Daddy shot:

• Mommy's friend Judith stopped by today.
  
• Grandma started making jal-tzu (boiled dumplings)...and what do I have to look forward to? Exciting breast milk...EVERY DAY!
  
• The view from outside my window
  

And here I am with a hiccup attack, going nuts under the jiminy!

I don't think Lucy's very happy about me...

...because I may be stealing all the attention. She just seems to be spending more and more time at the office.

And on an unrelated note, Daddy got a kick out of this little video.